Farewell Mum Jokes

Happy Tuesday.

With the modern stresses of workin’ 9 – 5 I’ve found no better way of relaxing than a few friendly Mum jokes.  A good friend recently left the office I work at and it seemed only right to pack him off with a good Mum gag…(no pun intended) in his card.

I drew up some fitting leaving / Mum joke tributes and then my colleagues rated them, and picked the best one to go in the card. These were the candidates:

It’s been a pleasure working with you for the last few months

And it’s always a pleasure working your mum.

We’ll miss you!

Like your Mum misses cock / the late night bus after too many vodkas

Stay in touch!

Leave you’re number with you’re Mum – we’ll all be seeing her later

We just wanted to say thanks!

To your Mum – but I guess I can tell her later

We’re sorry to hear you’re leaving

Sorry like you’re mum after another night in the cells for drunk disorderly

Best of luck with everything!

You’ll need it. If you turn out like you’re Mum you’ll be addicted to crack in no time

And the winner was….

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Sorry Chris

Robot Jokes

Happy Friday. At long last.

Yesterday I somehow managed to get into making robot based jokes with my friend Rob. I thought I’d share these.

Q: Why was the robot worried about kissing his girlbot?

A: Because he’d been eating dalek.

Q: When she got all in his face about it what did he decided to do?

A: Lever

Q: Where did this robot go straight afterwards?

A: Out on the pulley

Q: What’s a robots favourite type of exercise?

A: Cicuitboard training

Q: What symptoms do robots with tourettes suffer from?

A: Robot TICs

Q: Why did everyone love robo dog so much?

A: Because he was always wagging his digitail

Q: Why did the girlbot dump her botfriend?

A: He couldn’t get hardware

Q: Why are robots so good at robot dancing?

A: They have natural algorithm

Anyone got any additions?

Evil nine remix Super Pet…

… and officially make my Wednesday afternoon:

At least so far…

In their honour; a playlist: Evilest Nine

Cafe Del Mar – Aya – Sean (Erics 2Wfu Dub)

Recommended by a good – but unfortunately Bulgarian – friend* this is a beautiful ambience personified.

*Loosely speaking

FabricLive

Happy Tuesday.

You may have noticed the poignant lack of exclamation mark – this is because I do not feel very exclamatory today -full stop.

Anyway, on a brighter note I got the FabricLive discography at the weekend – something I’ve been wanting to for ages. I wanted to share some of my favourite  tracks so far.

One of the tracks on the Freeland album (but by Evil Nine) is Hired Goons can be heard here – taken from the amazing (and free) Soundcloud

I’ve also put together a Spotify playlist of some of my favourite tracks from what I’ve listened to so far – although I’m sure there’s more to come… Get it FabricLive <—right there

PS – If you want to find me on Spotify I’m simon_grant

Have a good day.

Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs

(what a fucking name) Were recommended by a friend of mine – Handsome Matt – earlier today. The only thing that I am unhappy about with this situation is that I didn’t find ‘em first.

I would put them loosely into the electro-minimal-indy-funk-tech genre, which basically means I haven’t got a clue, but whatever it is it’s good.

You can check out their track Garden here:

Their EP ‘All in Two Sixty Dancehall’  is on Spotify here: Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs – All In Two Sixty Dancehalls EP

Banging.

Happy Friday!

A tribute to ‘In White Rooms’

In 2006 Books Shade (German House duo Walter Merziger and Arno Kammermeier) released ‘Movements’. An album of epic proportions – my favourite tune is undoubtedly ‘In White Rooms’ (Hello Cathy)

Listening to a remix of this just a moment ago inspired me to  dig out the original, and all the remixes I could find (including the track blue rooms) and stick them in a playlist.

Voila: in white rooms

PS Their 2010 album Booka Shade – More! is worth a listen too